Many things have been happening, some good, some not so good. K is doing good. We went to the doctor friday and his lungs are clear and his blood work showed no changes. Thank you God.

We finally are receiving two of K's prescriptions in the mail, free of cost to us. That is a big load off my shoulders. That is a charity that I want us to give to. So many people have prescriptions written and there is no way on God's green earth that they can pay for them. I would love to be able to thank everyone that helps others get the medicine that they need just to stay alive.

I went to see my dietitian and she told me I have to eat more. Blah! A couple of times my blood glucose has dropped down in the forty range. I felt I was doing better with my eating but I have a long ways to go. Most of what I eat does not have very many carbs. I know I am eating more because I did lose 40 pounds this year. I think it is so strange to associate eating lots of food with weight loss. But I know it works, because it has helped me. I am suppose to be eating 1800 calories a day but I haven't managed to do that. I feel I am doing good when I get 1000 calories. I still don't have an appetite and it is hard to eat what I do make myself eat. I am still searching for something that I will get excited about eating. Something that I would look forward to eating everyday. I don't even want to eat the soup that at one time was my favorite food.

I am so happy to announce that I bought myself a pair of classic fit, zip up jeans with no elastic in the waist! Yea for me!!!! I won't announce the size, that still upsets me, but I am excited about my blue jeans. Also I splurged and had my hair colored and styled. I let the stylist shorten it to chin length and give me a messy uncombed look and I feel I don't look so fiftyish in the mirror anymore. I look like a spring chicken in my denims!!!! hahaha!!!

K's mother is another story. We have not been talking very often since K was in the hospital because she has K in his grave all ready. She only wants to talk to me about his death. She has all ready ask me about where does he want to be buried. I tell her he is doing good and she comes back with no he is not. So I don't take her calls very often. I talked with one of K's aunts last night, who is a good friend of mine. She called me back a few hours later and was upset and crying. She told me she had talked with my mother-in-law when she got off the phone with me. She repeated some of what I told her and my mother-in-law accused me of not knowing what I am talking about because I say that K is doing good. Am I wrong to say he is doing good even though he has cancer? How should I answer someone when they ask me how K is doing? I am at a loss.

I did apply for a grant to go to school and was denied. I am going to talk with the advisor at a technical school to see what other help I can get. Plus I need to check on the hours of the classes because I need to keep working. Right now I am just checking around to see what is out there for me. I have a long ways to go and I know I will find it with God's help.

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Thus saith the Lord God; In the day that I shall have cleansed you from all your iniquities I will also cause you to dwell in the cities, and the wastes shall be builded. And the desolate land shall be tilled, whereas it lay desolate in the sight of all that passed by. And they shall say, This land that was desolate is become like the garden of Eden; and the waste and desolate and ruined cities are become fenced, and are inhabited. Then the heathen that are left round about you shall know that I the Lord build the ruined places, and plant that that was desolate:I the Lord have spoken it, and I will do it. Ezekiel 36:33-36