Trust in the Lord

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Yes, everyone that is affected by these hurricanes have been in my thoughts and prayers. Why these storms have been back to back and people have barely enough time to recuperate is mind boggling. I am glad your families are all right.

This past week, I have been praying and listening; hoping to get rid of the confusion I feel has swallowed me. My shoulders are tied in knots. I am so tense and cannot relax. The whole time I am sitting; my leg is jigging up and down. Or I am swinging my foot. I try to stop but I can only be still for a minute. I get up and walk around and notice I am wringing my hands.

I feel I am spending too much thought on what I am suppose to be doing. I know God has been dealing with me for years. I have been turning my back. I know this and that is why I am upset. Every thing He said to me; I came back with you've got to be kidding, I can't do that. Plus, I didn't fight enough to make things happen. I let people keep me down.

Now I have this desperate need to do what God asks me. But I don't know how. I don't know how to make things happen or how to make people listen to what I want and need. I have allowed others to do my thinking and plan my life all these years. Now I fully understand that I will not have peace and joy unless I am following God's plan for my life. He foreknew and predestinated me and I must be about my Father's plan.

I have told God no for so long; I don't know whose plans I am hearing now, His or mine. I want to do the right thing. I want to do what God wants, not what I think He wants; I am having a trying time figuring out the difference.

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Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on our own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6