I went to the doctor this morning and all my test results did not come in. But my thyroid level was normal and my female hormones were normal. Oh yeah, I had maintained my weight from the last visit. I have not gained or lost with a calorie average of 600 a day.

I told the intern that I was still having muscle twitching, and tingling in my hands, feet, and face. I still have muscle weakness and I tire easily. This visit the head doctor came in and talked to me. I was told that normally a person recovers quickly after surgery. I am a rare case. Leave it to me to be a rare case. She said she wanted to do more blood work. They have not retested my parathyroid level since the surgery. My phosphorus level is below normal. She thinks I have a vitamin D deficiency. The doctor wants me to take a calcium supplement with vitamin D.

Mom and dad do not want me to go to work. My mother in law doesn't either. They are upset that I have the car and that I want to go work. They feel that I am only suppose to want to take care of them; be available when they need me. Now I am stuck with trying to decide what is right. I want to do something for me. I have been taking care of people and considering their feelings my whole life and I want to do other things. I don't know what "other things"; I have never had the chance to figure out what I would like to do. I don't want to be selfish; I just want more out of life. I want to be able to do the things I want without someone getting on to me about it. I am so confused about everything going on right now.