I have been having trouble with my cooking for some reason. I have had to throw out more ruined food these past five months than I have in the past five years. I can't seem to get a handle on why this is happening. Even when I follow a recipe, I don't always get it right.

One major example is my candy making. I have a great recipe for peanut butter fudge. But I have been having trouble getting the fudge right. I know all the facts about humidity, stirring, candy thermomater, beating it too much or not enough. I get the candy right about one out of five times. But when I have to throw away a batch of fudge, it upsets me. I have never liked being wasteful. I made some thursday and it didn't get hard. I tried again yesterday and it was too hard. This is very fustrating and lately I can't handle being fustrated.

But it isn't only candy I have been getting wrong. Everything I cook is below my standards. And one of the things I had been able to be pleased with about myself was cooking. I don't have but a few things that I like about my life and my list is getting shorter very quickly. I have been talking to God and asking for the touch of His loving hands.

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O Lord, thou hast searched me and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought afar off. Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, thou knowest it altogether. Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it. Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence? If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning , and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea: Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.
Psalm 139:1-10